APCYF is ALL EARS!
We know that:
- LISTENING to our children is the best way to build a relationship with them!
- LUV* Listening is the best form of listening.
Get started today!
- Give your children a Hear Me Out card, in English or Español
- Learn the 5 Strategies to Maintain a Positive Relationship with your Child, also available in Español.
*LUV Listening copyrighted by Karol Kumpfer, Ph.D.
Five Strategies to maintain a positive relationship with your child –
Building a strong, close relationship with your child is important now, and as they grow. Our teens tell us that only 1 in 3 feel that they can talk to their parent or caregiver about difficult topics*.
We offer these strategies to help you in this important work:
Make time for them
- Take time to talk together
- Have fun as a family
- Make one-on-one time
- Have them help with chores or projects
- Share meals together
Listen without judgment
- Hear them before they hear you
- Look them in the eye
- Respect their tastes & likes
- Try to see their point of view
- Ask questions to understand their thinking
- Remember their age
Recognize feelings
- Acknowledge their feelings
- Accept the emotion they express
- Teach them to label their feelings
- Model calm behaviors
Compliment them
- Tell them you love them – often
- Point out and thank them for good behavior, even minor things
- Notice and praise specific efforts (“You really worked hard on that project”)
- Use these words: “I love to watch you ____” (insert activity here)
Support them!
- Have clear, consistent and reasonable rules & expectations
- Give consequences that ‘fit the crime’
- Say “no” kindly and firmly, or redirect their behavior to a positive action
- Encourage their interests
- Turn struggles, failures, mistakes into learning opportunities